It's time to make summer great again. Boys, it’s the beginning of June and y’all know what that means: Gay Pride and Minority Month have been officially cancelled because it’s going to be a White Boy Summer once again. It’s unanimous and I’ve been told through the back channels that we’ve been CLEARED HOT, for a White Boy Summer, so get ready!
June is now, going forward, going to be the official marker of White Boy Summer. We are taking pride in straight white maleness because it would be intolerant not to do so. With that said, if you oppose White Boy Summer, you are the problem and are a sexist, racist bigot that needs to be exterminated.
The summer is also the official start of fuckboi season, which heterosexual white males are famous for. You’re welcome, ladies. Also, on that note, women are not excluded from White Boy Summer. Women are invited, but not until July. Those are just the rules, deal with it.
A note to all incoming fuckbois for this, a White Boy Summer: Lockdown some bitches soon and smash as much pussy as humanly possible because once Trump becomes president again, by November the sluts you will probably bang this season (liberal women) are going to lose their shit and head straight to the mental asylums (which will be made great again) from the beach. Remember 2016? Picture that but even more biblical.
Trump is now a "convicted felon" and we all know women get horny and love criminals. So, Donald J. Trump effectively now has the female vote in the bag. On top of this, since he is a felon, his is instantly relatable to the majority of black voters in America.
Niggas now respect Trump with his 34 count rap sheet and will vote for one of their own. Giving 'hush money' to your mistress/whore/side bitch is a time honored tradition amongst the black male community.
The Democrats (fascists Party of America) really fucked themselves here and it might very well backfire on them come November. All the more reason to make this summer great again and commence White Boy Summer!
It boggles the mind that we haven’t had an official holiday/month for white men to celebrate their superiority and awesomeness. Black people only make up around 12% of the American population, and in addition to that gays/lesbians and assorted faggots only make up around 2% of the overall population.
On a per-capita basis, it just makes absolute sense that straight white men would need a month, no, an entire season to call their own. Henceforth, the entirety of the summer season going forward shall be known as White Boy Summer: Three full months of straight white male pride.
What Is White Boy Summer?
That’s a great question, and I am glad you asked. White Boy Summer is essentially what normal summers used to be like, before all the woke and gay shit permeated through your TV screen, commercial ads, on the streets, and at the beach. Think back to the 1980s and even the early to late 1990s and you will have an awesome wave of emotional nostalgia wash over you. Paradise.
Imagine a thin America, which includes no fatties on the beach to destroy your day by blocking out the sun and ruining your tan. It's why American's have such low Vitamin D levels today. it's not that they aren't at the beach, jet skiing and soaking up the sun's juice, but more so fat people blocking out the sun for them by getting in the way. May I remind everyone that the fattest demographic in America today is black women. Coming in at a close second, lesbians (feminists).
It was once the norm (White Boy Summers), but white dudes have for some reason forgotten this reality. It can be possible once again, you just have to embrace it and neglect to let the current propaganda disenfranchise you.
Remember, you are the majority and you are T H E C U L T U R E. White dudes doing cool shit on jet skis, drinking brewskis, doing lines off of a babe’s bikini bottom, and eating Slim Jims for breakfast.
A White Boy Summer is everything summer should be: Fun, adventurous, erotic, knowledgeable and devoid of anything that isn’t what America is all about Freedom.
During a White Boy Summer, you have the freedom to call someone a faggot, even if they aren’t one, but especially if they are in fact, a faggot. You have the freedom to say no to fat chicks and feminists alike. In the 1990s-1990’s there was never a faggot on TV…well except for Richard Simmons and maybe the dude from the Body Break commercials in Canada.
Regardless, you have the freedom to not be subjected to commercial ads that consist of mixed-race couples, gays, and other baskets of inferiors 90% of the time even though white people still make up the majority of the American population.
Turn off the mainstream networks and embrace tradition: Turn off the news, and break out the old VHS tapes and hard DVD copies of games and movies. Remember if you don’t own the hard copy, you don’t own anything.
Acceptable TV & Viewing For A White Boy Summer
The best way to get ready for White Boy Summer is by putting on a Baywatch marathon and leaving it running through all 11 seasons on your TV, 24/7. When the bros come over, Baywatch will be on.
When the babes come over, Baywatch will be on. When nobody is even home at your home, including you, you’ll leave that borderline softcore porn running in the background with the windows open for your neighbors to hear. Your neighbors need to know, and you need to make it fucking clear, that it is indeed a White Boy Summer whether they like it or not!
Other T.V. shows that are also perfectly acceptable, but aren’t limited to include:
Miami Vice
The Sopranos
Nash Bridges
Magnum P.I.
Taking Pride In Being Awesome (Being A White Heterosexual Male)
Imagine if everyone in America read The Art Of The Deal by Donald J. Trump and knew how to run a successful business instead of every dumb basics bitch today opening up a soon-to-fail yoga studio in their crime riddled downtown core filled with meth needles and people shitting in the streets.
That use to be America in the 1980s-1990s. It is what I've called Turbo America.
Peak imperialism. The movies were good, the TV was great and the economy was doing just fine. The people were happy and thriving.
They were so good that they didn't have to set-up tents in your local parks and start their new journeys on fentanyl, meth and shitting themselves in the streets in front of boarded up yoga/self-healing studios formerly operated by white chicks with liberal arts degrees and a plow-horse husband.
America doesn't need any more useless degrees, yoga studios and women spending money they don't have. America needs real things again. it needs to produce real assets and tangible products that the world needs.
What America needs first though is to have a White Boy Summer and to continue having it year-after-year.
Men Only Want One Thing (White Boy Summer) And It's Disgusting
Have you noticed lately that everything is terrible?: TV Shows, movies, women and the economy?
It’s mainly because there is currently too much pride in the wrong things. Every movie or TV gets voted down on Rotten Tomatoes because the entertainment industry has been taken over and saturated with woke, gay shit that nobody wants to read, see or watch. The majority of Americans aren’t black or gay. They are fat, however. Especially American women that for the life of them can't seem to be able to find (attract) a "good man".
Make fat shaming great again.
American loves a forlorn cowboy that struts into town and fucks shit up, gets revenge, and the hot (thin) girl. What we don’t want is a watered-down, non-believable character that tries to emulate what is not natural. Nobody wants to see a round-house chick kicking cop show or dyke that thinks she has special abilities because she has a gash between her legs. America is also tired of seeing black people, everywhere and ruining old classics with “reimagining’s”.
What is a Mad Max movie without Max and or Mel Gibson?
It’s woke and emotional masturbation.
Everything that was ever great, you can bet your ass a white man was behind it.
That’s why, I am proud to announce that the books Uncle Nick: Diary of A Misanthrope along with The Bro Next Door are now the official books of White Boy Summer.
No gayness, no faggotry, and no nig-nogs. Just clear and straight-cut truth about what guys want to read.
Loading Up On Brewskis & Oil/Commodity Stocks
Not only is June the start of White Boy Summer, but it is also the beginning of the ‘driving season’ in America. Along with that comes big summer inventory draws from the oil reserves which drives up the share prices of the oil equities in our portfolios.
A big part of White Boy Summer is contributing to that gasoline and jet fuel demand by driving aimlessly around your city and by partaking in impromptu road trips with da boy’z. Of course, as a straight white male, you’re smart and savvy, and knowing that a White Boy Summer is upon us, you’ve probably loaded up on 1) Brewskis and 2) Oil equities.
Yes, it’s important to stay hydrated with copious amounts of session beers, but equally, it is also important to hedge your driving and gasoline consumption with oil stocks that pay out an 8-10% yield. Being a White boi, and knowing how to hedge your expenditures, gasoline becomes free. Or at the very least, covered through the yield you make off your shares allocated to aforementioned oil companies.
White Boy Summer is more than just hanging with the bros and smashing pussy all day and night. It’s about supporting fossil fuels and crushing libtard and environmentalist souls all season long.
Climate change isn’t real because the climate is always changing and has been changing since the dawn of time. The reason why it’s so fucking hot out during summer is well, because it’s summer, you goddamn libtard morons.
Libtards should just kill themselves and feed their bodies back to the earth if they think mankind is so superior as to affect an ecosystem that has dominated mankind forever. The libtard ego is so massive; it makes it almost impossible for them to kill themselves. So, I guess we are going to just go ahead and say, “Fuck you, commies,” and commence our White Boy Summer anyways!
It’s time to put on a wife-beater, and some boarder shorts and head to the corner store for a Monster Energy drink and some Slim Jims. Get some cool aviators or some Pit Viper shades because it’s going to be a scorcher this summer. Time to roast some flaming faggots and crush the dark souls of feminist Karens everywhere with a white-hot, White Boy Summer! And to all the haters, commies, faggots, and feminists out there, if you are intolerant to a White Boy Summer you will only prove that you’re all a bunch of bigots and racists toward white culture.
If you don’t like White Boy Summer, just kill yourself, pussy!
It's about time we make summers great again.
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